“Go outside and play!”
I’m willing to bet that’s something you heard quite a bit growing up. Or maybe, like me, you didn’t need to be told. You were already halfway out the door.
Riding bikes, climbing trees, swimming, exploring the woods. We spent entire afternoons entertaining ourselves, coming home dirty, tired, and occasionally sporting a new collection of scrapes and bruises.
Nobody was counting our steps or worrying about how many calories we’d burned. We were too busy having fun. Our only real responsibility was getting home on time and hoping our younger siblings didn’t rat us out about our more questionable adventures.
Somewhere along the way, though, things changed.
Maybe it started in our teens, when we became too cool for some of the things we used to love. Then came jobs, families, responsibilities, and all the other demands of adulthood.
We didn’t necessarily stop enjoying those things. We just stopped making time for them.
And eventually, even the simple pleasure of moving our bodies became something we were supposed to accomplish.
When Did Movement Become So Serious?
Think about how we approach movement as adults.
Walking becomes a step goal. Riding a bike becomes cardio. Swimming becomes laps. Even dancing can turn into a workout with a timer and a calorie count.
We have fitness trackers, exercise plans, and endless recommendations about how much movement we need and what kind is best.
There’s certainly value in all of that. I believe in the importance of strength, endurance, and maintaining our physical abilities as we age.
But somewhere in the process of taking better care of ourselves, I think we’ve managed to make movement feel like another responsibility.
Another thing to schedule. Another goal to reach. Another opportunity to feel like we’re falling short.
And when we’re already juggling work, family, and everything else that needs our attention, adding another obligation isn’t always particularly appealing.
Remember when we moved simply because something looked fun?
We rode our bikes to see where the road went. We jumped into the water because it was hot outside. We climbed things just to see if we could.
We weren’t trying to accomplish anything.
We were enjoying ourselves.
I think there’s something worth revisiting there, especially in midlife.
Because while we’re busy figuring out how to take better care of our bodies, maybe we should also be asking ourselves when we stopped doing some of the things that made us feel good in the first place.
I Had Forgotten How Much I Loved to Play
I was always a climber as a kid.
Trees, monkey bars, anything that presented a reasonable opportunity to get myself off the ground. I loved climbing things.
But somewhere between childhood and adulthood, I stopped. I couldn’t tell you when or why. It simply wasn’t something I thought about anymore.
Until I started training for a Spartan Race.
If you’re familiar with Spartan Races, you know they involve a fair amount of upper-body strength. Something I was discovering I didn’t have nearly enough of.
I spent hours lifting weights, doing pushups and burpees, and struggling to accomplish a single pull-up.
I was working hard, but progress was frustratingly slow.
Eventually, I decided to try rock climbing as a last-hope training strategy.
And something unexpected happened.
Within minutes, the movements felt strangely familiar. Reaching, pulling, balancing, figuring out where to put my hands and feet.
I was completely absorbed in what I was doing.
And I was having an absolute blast.
It reminded me of something I hadn’t thought about in years.
I loved climbing things.
Apparently, I still did.
Before long, I was stronger than I’d ever been. I even managed my first pull-up, at thirty-something years old.
All that time I’d spent struggling through exercises to build upper-body strength, and I’d finally found something that worked remarkably well for me.
The funny part was that I wasn’t thinking about building strength while I was climbing.
I was thinking about getting to the top.
I was thinking about where to put my foot next, whether I could reach that next hold, and how much fun I was having figuring it all out.
I was playing.
And I was hooked.
To this day, I can spend hours climbing without noticing the time passing. My fingers occasionally bleed, I get scratched up, and when I’m climbing outside, I seem to be the preferred meal for every mosquito in the forest.
I don’t care.
I love it.
And I’ve never once found myself looking at the clock, wondering how much longer I have to keep climbing to finish my workout.
That’s a pretty significant difference.
Now, I’m certainly not suggesting everyone should take up rock climbing. Although if it sounds interesting, give it a try!
My point is that I rediscovered something I’d loved as a child, something that had simply disappeared from my life as I got older.
And it made me wonder how many other things we leave behind without ever really deciding to.
Making Room for Play Again
By midlife, most of us have spent decades being responsible adults.
We’ve worked, raised families, cared for other people, managed households, and done our best to keep everything moving in the right direction.
There’s always something that needs to be done.
And somewhere in all of that, doing something simply because we enjoy it can start to feel a little indulgent.
We tell ourselves we’ll get around to it when we have more time. When the house is clean. When the work is finished. When everything else is taken care of.
Of course, there’s almost always something else that needs our attention.
I think this is one of those habits worth questioning.
When did we decide that every activity needs a purpose beyond our own enjoyment?
That an afternoon spent exploring a trail needs to count as exercise? That dancing around the kitchen is somehow less worthwhile than a scheduled workout? That spending a few hours doing something we love requires an explanation?
And why do we sometimes feel guilty about taking that time for ourselves?
Play gives us something that can be surprisingly difficult to find in our busy adult lives.
The opportunity to be completely engaged in what we’re doing, without worrying about what comes next.
To be curious. To laugh. To challenge ourselves. To get a little dirty or make a fool of ourselves without caring quite so much what anyone thinks.
Sometimes that means moving our bodies. Other times it might mean trying something creative, learning a new skill, playing games, or exploring somewhere we’ve never been.
Play doesn’t have to look the same for everyone.
And it doesn’t have to look the same as it did when we were kids.
Maybe you still love riding your bike. Maybe you’ve always wanted to try kayaking, learn to dance, or get back on a pair of roller skates.
Maybe you’d rather spend an afternoon wandering through the woods, collecting interesting rocks, or exploring a place you’ve never visited.
Or maybe there’s something entirely new you’ve been curious about but haven’t quite given yourself permission to try.
I think midlife is a wonderful time to rediscover that curiosity.
We’ve spent enough years doing what we’re supposed to do. There’s something refreshing about making room for what we actually want to do, too.
There’s More to Health Than Exercise
We talk a lot about the physical changes that come with midlife and the importance of staying active.
And for good reason.
Maintaining strength, mobility, and cardiovascular health matters. Structured exercise has an important place in a healthy lifestyle, and if you enjoy your routine, there’s no reason to give it up.
But our well-being involves considerably more than our physical condition.
It’s also about how we feel as we move through our days.
The stress that seems to melt away when we spend time outdoors. The laughter that comes from doing something ridiculous with a friend. The satisfaction of learning something new or discovering that we’re capable of something we didn’t think we could do.
Those experiences matter, too.
There’s a particular kind of freedom in becoming so absorbed in something enjoyable that you lose track of time.
For a little while, you’re simply there, engaged in what you’re doing.
No mental checklist. No worrying about tomorrow. No pressure to make the experience productive.
And sometimes, that’s exactly what we need.
I also think there’s something important about remembering that getting older doesn’t mean we have to become increasingly serious.
We can be responsible, capable adults and still be curious, adventurous, and a little silly.
We can take our health seriously without taking every moment of our lives quite so seriously.
In fact, I suspect many of us could benefit from a little less seriousness now and then.
So, What Did You Love to Do?
Think back for a minute.
What did you enjoy before life became so busy?
What could keep you entertained for hours? What made you lose track of time? What did you look forward to doing simply because it was fun?
Maybe you’ve already found ways to keep those things in your life.
If you have, wonderful. Keep doing them.
But if something comes to mind that you haven’t done in years, perhaps it’s worth revisiting.
You might discover that you still love it.
Or you might discover something new that brings you just as much joy.
Either way, I think there’s real value in making room for experiences that have no greater purpose than enjoying ourselves.
We’ve spent a lot of years learning to be responsible adults. Maybe it’s time to remember how to play a little, too.
After all, you’re a grown-up now.
You don’t need anyone’s permission.
You don’t have to be home before dark.
And you certainly don’t have to justify spending an hour, or three, doing something you love.
So the next time you head out the door, leave the expectations behind.
Just go play.
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