I have always had a love-hate relationship with exercise.
For me, it was mostly about weight loss and looking a certain way, so I’d suffer through whatever workouts promised the best results. And if memory serves me correctly, there was a lot of suffering – we grew up in the time of “no pain, no gain.”
The pain was expected…almost desirable. If you weren’t feeling it, you were wasting your time.
I loved how I looked after a few consistent months–especially with strength training, but I hated doing it. I hated going to the gym. So eventually, I’d stop. Then I’d get frustrated with myself for “failing” and the cycle would start all over again.
In my 30s, I figured out that the best way to be consistent about exercise is to find things that I enjoy doing. For me, that’s bike riding, rock climbing, and hiking. I love being outdoors…and I don’t think I’ve stepped foot in a gym since.
In my 40s, life started getting a little busier and my movement naturally declined. At first, it didn’t seem like a big deal…until getting outside became a special occasion instead of a normal Tuesday evening. I didn’t realize how much my body was affected until I started feeling it–less energy, random soreness, and more moodiness.
And of course, my clothes were starting to fit a little differently.
It also occurred to me that midlife is probably the worst time to stop moving.
It’s not about chasing a “before-and-after” photo or trying to reclaim a high school body. It’s much more practical than that.
This is the window where we decide how we’re going to age. We’re setting the stage for our future independence, so it makes sense to support our bodies in a way that actually lasts.
Why Muscle Matters More Now
Losing muscle mass is a normal part of aging–and it gets harder to build muscle as we get older. But in this stage of life, muscle is more important than ever for reasons that reach far beyond “looking good.” Muscle also supports:
Bone Density
Declining estrogen levels can accelerate bone loss. Muscle acts as a protective “internal armor” that helps stabilize the body and reduce the risk of fractures over time.
Metabolism
Muscle is a metabolically active tissue, meaning it burns more energy (calories) at rest. More muscle can help counter the slow weight gain that often shows up in midlife.
Blood Sugar Stability
In perimenopause, hormonal fluctuations can contribute to increased insulin resistance. Having more muscle improves insulin sensitivity and helps prevent the energy crashes, cravings, and systemic inflammation caused by blood sugar spikes.
Stress Resiience
Muscle helps regulate the body’s cortisol response. Women with more muscle mass tend to recover from stress more efficiently. This prevents the “fight or flight” system from staying stuck in the “on” position and helps reduce many of the long-term effects of chronic stress on the body.
Sleep
Physical effort builds “sleep pressure,” which is our natural drive to fall asleep at night and supports a deeper, more restorative sleep – essential for cellular repair and cognitive function
Redefining What “Strength” Actually Looks Like
Many of us hear the words “strength training” and immediately become intimidated at the thought of going to the gym and grueling daily workouts.
Let’s reframe strength training as a category of movement, rather than a whole unattainable something that we may not even want to aspire to.
Realistically, if you are moving your body against any kind of resistance, you are doing the work. You don’t need 3 sets of reps for every body part, two hours in the gym, or anything that resembles “bulking.”
If that’s your thing, that’s great! You’re ahead of the game. For the rest of us, it helps to point out that strength training doesn’t always have to mean “pumping iron.”
It can also look like:
- bodyweight movements (squats, push-ups, step-ups)
- light weights (dumbbells, even soup cans)
- resistance bands
- everyday movement—carrying groceries (or grandchildren), moving furniture around, gardening
These are all moments where your muscles are responding to a challenge. If your muscles are feeling that tug of resistance, you’re doing it.
That’s really all there is to it.
Finding Your Own Realistic Rhythm
Instead of looking for a perfect program to follow (and inevitably feel guilty about and stop doing when life gets in the way), it helps to think about a rhythm. Programs are rigid–rhythms are flexible. A rhythm allows for adjustment based on how your week is actually going.
The goal is to keep it simple enough that you don’t have to overthink it or take huge chunks out of your day. Try to aim for short strength sessions—just 15 or 20 minutes—two or three times a week.
Research shows that spreading movement throughout the day can be as beneficial as doing it all at once. The beauty of this approach is that “moving” doesn’t need to be a separate event in your day – that means you don’t need to drive anywhere or fit something else into your already busy schedule.
It can be as simple as a 10-minute YouTube video before your morning shower or a quick circuit while dinner is in the oven.
When we start fitting movement into our lives, instead of waiting for a better time (that’s never going to come), it finally becomes a habit and a sustainable part of our routine.
The Bigger Picture: Cardio and Flexibility
While we’re focusing on muscle in this post, cardio and flexibility still need to be mentioned here.
If you’re doing structured strength training, you’re probably getting your heart rate elevated sufficiently. In midlife, we don’t need hours of cardio and too much can actually backfire and increase the stress in our body.
Light cardio, like a brisk walk or a bike ride, is important for supporting your heart and your mood, but it doesn’t need to be intense.
Basic stretching is also important. As we age, we tend to get tighter, stiffer. Suddenly you reach for a coffee cup and pull a muscle for no apparent reason!
A few minutes of stretching in the morning or before bed (and before and after exercising) can help keep you loose, limber, and injury-free.
In midlife, intentional movement is about making sure you continue to feel comfortable and capable as you move through your day, whether you’re reaching for something on a high shelf or getting down on the floor to play with a pet.
You don’t need the newest fad (although if it motivates you, go for it!). You don’t need a perfect routine or plan…and you don’t have to follow a strict set of rules.
You just need to keep moving in ways that support your body–consistently.
Breaking Down the Real Barriers
Let’s be honest: the reason we don’t exercise isn’t because we don’t know that exercise is good for us. We know.
The real barriers are often just life – and the stories we tell ourselves while we procrastinate. We tell ourselves we don’t have the time, or we don’t have the right equipment, or we’ll start on Monday when we’ll feel more motivated.
But motivation is rarely there when you actually need it…and ironically, motivation usually follows action. So the trick isn’t to wait for motivation…it’s to lower the bar so far that you don’t need motivation to clear it.
Start ridiculously small.
Pick two movements—just two. Maybe it’s a sit-to-stand from a chair and wall push-ups. Do them for five minutes, twice this week.
That’s it, just get started.
That small start is where most of the magic happens. It signals to your brain that you can show up for yourself, which makes it easier to do it again and again.
A Different Way To Think About This Journey
These days, my workouts mostly consist of playing with my dog–walking, hiking, and just being outside. Several days a week, I will do 10-15 burpees before we set out and again when we get back. Some days we power walk, other days, we take it easy and she gets a “sniff walk.”
The walks need to happen anyway, I just try to be more intentional about it.
At the end of the day, strength training in midlife isn’t about building a perfect body. It’s about building and maintaining muscle, which keeps us strong and helps offset the effects of perimenopause hormone fluctuations.
It’s about showing up for the “you” that’s going to be around ten, twenty, or thirty years from now.
The goal is just to keep going, one movement at a time. Because over time, that’s the only thing that truly changes the story.
Pathways and Potions 
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